He sighed softly as he felt her arms encircle him and her warm breath dance across his neck.
"You're having second thoughts."
It wasn't a question...it was a statement. He gave a rueful smile. She knew him far too well. He placed his thesis down on the table and took his glasses off. Gently rubbing the bridge of his nose he turned to face her. He stared into her brilliant green eyes and found what he was looking for.
"You believe in me. You've supported me through all of this. You've spent hours questioning me, forcing me to ensure my theories match my proof." He gently reached out and touched her cheek. "Why? Why do you have so much faith in me?"
She smiled and took his hand from her face, entwining her fingers with his and led him over to the couch. She pulled him down beside her and kissed him tenderly.
"People are always scared of what is different. They are often afraid to question what has been true for so long. If people like you didn't exist...we would all still believe the world was flat, that flying was purely for birds and that people can't change history." She laid her hand over his chest. "You live...from here. You don't just look at things, you feel them. In your heart. You hold a passion for your work that...I haven't seen in a long time. I believe in you because you seek the truth, where ever it hides. And you want others to know, you want to share the wonder of your work with the world. You change people Daniel. You change the way people look at things. You make people question what they are told...you make them want to find the truth. And that is something...something that great people throughout our history have done."
He looked down at their entwined hands. "What if they don't believe me? What if they laugh me off the stage? What then? I'll never be able to work again."
She softly raised his head and looked into his eyes. "Would it matter? You know the truth...and one day, so will everyone else. And it will change our lives and our world forever. And you will be remembered."
*-*
Daniel stood infront of the headstone and silently said a prayer. He'd lost so much over the years, he was beginning to wonder if that was all life held in store for him. If he was committed to a life of suffering and loss. To lose those he loved. To care too much. To want too much. He sighed as someone came to stand beside him.
"I had this memorial placed here, because it was close to home. I wanted somewhere, where I could talk to them. Somewhere I could come...when I needed to gain some clarity." He looked up at his friend and saw a look of understanding cross his face. "You know it's funny. How we can never talk to people when they're alive...and yet, we spend so much time going over the things we wished we'd said."
Jack looked at the memorial. Clare and Melbourne Jackson. Daniel's parents. "They would have been proud of you Daniel. Of what you've done. Of what you've achieved. The person you've become...I know they would have been proud."
Daniel smiled softly. "Thanks Jack."
Jack fell silent and let his friend say his good-byes. The memorial garden was quiet and held an air of tranquility about it. He watched as a lone figure approached a nearby plaque and placed a single red rose by it. He moved away from Daniel slightly and studied the woman. She was about Daniel's age, with curly brown hair and even at this distance, he could tell she was attractive. In the stillness of the air, he heard her whispered words.
"...your son asks about you everyday. I tell him what I can remember but...I sometimes wonder if it's enough...I wish he'd known you...he has your eyes...and your passion...you would have been proud of him." Jack watched the silent tears track down her face. She raised her hand and brushed them away. "I often wonder...if I'd found out sooner...if you'd have known...would you have gone? Would we be here...like this...today...or would you still be with us?" She placed her fingers to her mouth and kissed them, then gently laid her hand on the stone. "We miss you." She slowly stood up and walked away from the memorial, nodding politely to Jack as she passed him.
Jack sighed. So many people he'd known had lost someone. He'd lost so many of his friends in the past few years. Not to mention his son as well. He slowly walked over to where she'd been standing and glanced at the plaque. His heart beat slowed as he read the words...they burned into his mind, as if in slow motion. The world around him became hazy and all he could see, was the inscription. He didn't feel Daniel shake him softly. He didn't feel Daniel's hand suddenly grip his arm. But he did hear Daniel's voice reading out the words infront of him.
In loving memory of
Dr Daniel Jackson
Born: July 8th 1965
Died: November 22nd 1995
You were never given the chance to know your son.
Know our thoughts are forever with you.
May you have finally found peace.
"Jack?"
His voice sliced through Jack's heart and pulled him back to reality. "There...there was a woman here...she..." He looked around quickly, trying to see which direction she had taken, but Daniel was already running. He skidded into the parking lot as the car pulled out onto the main street. He moaned and bent over to catch his breath, torn between the insane desire to run after that car until he collapsed and the sensible suggestion that he needed more information. Still breathing heavily he looked up as Jack appeared next to him.
"Take me back to the base."
*-*
Daniel looked down at the certificate and drew in a sharp breath.
Name of Child: Daniel Robert Jackson
Date of Birth: May 14th 1996
Mother: Rachel White, Dr. - Egyptologist.
Father: Daniel Jackson, Dr. - Deceased.
"I...I have a son..." Daniel felt his heart constrict as the news sank in. "I have a son...who has never met his father. He doesn't even know I'm alive." He looked up from the piece of paper in his hands.
Jack just looked at his friend. He didn't know what to say. This was the type of situation that Carter was good at handling - not him. Daniel looked lost. He looked like he was struggling to grasp this new information, this new role that he'd been given.
"What do I do Jack? What the hell do I do now?"
Jack sat down opposite him. "I don't have the answers Daniel. I don't think anyone does...apart from you."
Daniel gave a snort of indignation. "Seven years Jack. Seven years of his life have been lost to me. How the hell can I even begin to make up for something like that? What do I do? Do I just walk in there and say 'Hi Rachel, remember me...well guess what? I'm not dead!'...tell me Jack...tell me...what am I going to do?"
"What do you want to do Daniel?" Jack's voice was low and soft. He hated to be the one to do this. He was no good at this sort of thing. "Do you want to become part of this child's life? Be a father to him? Or do you just want to walk away and pretend this information is still buried?"
Daniel frowned sharply. "You know I could never do that Jack."
"So? The question really is...how do you tell his mother that you're still alive...without alienating her? How do you ask her...to let you in?"
"To be honest with you..." Daniel sighed deeply and sat down. "...I don't think that will be possible. I was with Rachel for 2 years. She supported me through all my work on the Pyramids and my Giza Theory. She encouraged me to give that lecture. I left her Jack. I took Catherine's job offer, went through the gate and married Sha're...without even calling to say goodbye, without even thinking about the woman I left behind." He looked up at Jack with tears in his eyes. "I dismissed her in the blink of an eye. How can I even contemplate asking her, to let me back into her life."
"You have a son Daniel." Jack placed his hand on Daniel's shoulder. "I'd say jump in the deep end...and sink or swim!"
"That's easy for you to say."
"Yes it is. But this isn't about you...and it's not about her. It's about your son. And what ever you decide...it has to be a permanent choice. Your son has a father. You deserve the chance to BE that father. And your son deserves the chance to know that father."
Daniel nodded slowly. "I'm not walking away from this Jack." He looked down at the address on his desk. "I need some time off."
*-*
Rachel cursed as she swung into the car park and abandoned her car in the first space she could find. She ran into the school, heading straight for the principles office. She burst into the secretary's office and sobbed in relief to see Danny sat in a chair, swinging his legs.
"Oh my god..." She made her way over to her son and hugged him. "...you're alright?" She pulled back and looked at him. "Are you ok? Did he hurt you?"
Danny shook his head. "Daddy would never hurt me."
Rachel frowned in confusion and glanced at the secretary who beckoned her over. "Stay right here ok...do not move."
Danny nodded. "Sure Mom."
Rachel walked over to Ms Baxter. "What happened?"
"We noticed a man standing outside the school yard at lunchtime. We informed security but before they could act, Danny went running over to him calling him 'daddy'. Of course, we know his father is dead so naturally, security separated them."
Rachel nodded. "Thank you. Where is this man now?"
"He's in with the Principle. Danny is insistent that the man is his father." The secretary gently took Rachel's arm as she went to walk away. "Ms White...his security number checks out. His is Dr Daniel Jackson."
Rachel closed her eyes. "That's just not possible...it's just..." Her voice trailed off as the door to the other office opened and the Principle looked out.
"Ah...Ms White. Please. Come in."
Rachel looked at her son. "Do not move." She walked into the office and froze. There, sitting in a chair, infront of the desk, was a very sheepish looking Daniel. Even though 7 years had past, and even though his physical appearance had changed, she knew her son was right.
"Please...take a seat." The Principle indicated to a seat next to Daniel's and Rachel dutifully sat down, her eyes not leaving his. "I am sure that Ms Baxter has filled you in on the situation. We wanted to talk to you before we called the police in..."
"There won't be any need for that." Rachel's voice was soft and it betrayed her feelings all too well. "This is Danny's father." She looked at the ghost from her past and shook her head softly. "May we have a minute please."
The Principle stood up. "Of course." She made her way over to the door. "I'll be outside if you need me."
Rachel sighed as she left the office and returned her attention once more to the man sat beside her. "What were you thinking?" Her voice was barely above a whisper and she berated herself for sounding so weak.
Daniel's mouth twitched upwards slightly. "I wasn't. Oh god Rachel...I didn't know. When I came back, so much in my life had changed. I'd just lost my wife and..." He stopped at the expression on her face.
"Your wife? You were married?" Utter disbelief ran through her words. She laughed softly. "You walked out on me...after two years, without a word. And you reappear...at my son's school nearly 8 years later and tell me...you got married! How long did that take you Daniel? Was I that easy to forget?"
Daniel cursed under his breath. "Now is not the time for this...this isn't about us..."
"No...you're right! This isn't about us. Regardless of how I feel about this...this is about a little boy, who has wanted nothing more, than a chance to know his father. I'm not about to deny him that chance. But I want to make one thing perfectly clear." Daniel winced at the hard, cold tone of her voice and watched her as she stood up. "If you hurt him...in any way...you'll wish you were dead."
Daniel looked at the woman opposite him. They'd shared so much together and he felt guilty about how quickly he'd forgotten her. He'd met Sha're on Abydos and married her, without giving the woman he'd left behind a second thought. And now, he felt nothing but remorse for the way he'd behaved. He knew he'd loved Sha're and he had no regrets about the time they'd spent together - but Rachel had supported him through his darkest times, when he'd been writing his theories, she'd encouraged him. And he'd dismissed her so quickly. He sighed softly. "Rachel...I..."
She raised her hand quickly. "I think...we all need some time to adjust Dr Jackson."
"It's Daniel." He sighed heavily. This was not going well. "Rachel...what's in the past is gone. I can't change it. I can't magically turn back time and erase the past 7 years. What matters now is how we move forward." He frowned slightly as a small smile crossed her face. As a memory clicked into place, he returned that smile. "A very wise friend once told me that."
Rachel looked at him carefully, unwittingly connected to him via the same memory. She sighed softly. "Friends is a good place to start Daniel." She extended her hand out to him and helped him up. "I do believe...there is a little boy outside...who wants to be held...by his father."
Daniel's smile grew wider. "Really?"
"Daniel...I can't say that I'm completely happy about this...I'm not even going to try and lie to you. This is very confusing for me. You disappeared without even a phone call and it hurt. It hurt me a lot." She frowned softly and looked down at the table. "But having said that...this isn't about me...it's not about us...it's about Danny. He needs his father...in whatever capacity you feel comfortable with. You can see him as much as your job allows...I'm not going to deny you that. It's up to you."
Daniel nodded and slowly opened the door. Danny jumped up and ran into his open arms. And as Rachel watched them, she swore to herself that no matter what happened...she would put the needs of her son first. They all had a long road ahead of them...and she was going to make sure that her feelings on the matter stayed well and truly buried.
*-*
Danny sat in the car, exhausted. Daniel had taken him out for the day to a theme park. They'd been on nearly every ride in the park, except a few that Danny was too short for. Eaten until they could eat no more and then gone shopping at a nearby mall. As the car neared the town, Danny looked over at his father.
"She gets lonely you know. She doesn't mean to be mad at you. She's just...having trouble dealing."
Daniel nearly choked at his son's choice of words. "I think...you're watching too much TV." He grinned over at him.
"Maybe. But I know that she's pleased you're here."
"Oh? How?"
"She told me."
"Really?"
"Yeah. She said she was glad I had this chance. That no child should be without his parents."
Daniel sighed. "Very true."
Danny turned in his seat so that he was facing his father. "Are you guys getting back together?"
Daniel raised his eyebrow as he turned into their street. "Um...no. Why do you ask?"
Danny shrugged. "Just wondered." He leaned over and kissed his father, and opened the door as Daniel pulled up outside the house. He stopped midway out of the door and looked back at Daniel smiling. "Every Wednesday she rents a film and settles down with a glass of wine....maybe you should come over." And with that, he was out the car and running up the path to the house.
Daniel watched as Rachel hugged her son and smiled as she rolled her eyes as he began pouring out the events of the day. She looked up and waved before leading him into the house. Daniel stared at the closed front door for a moment and then made his way back to his apartment.
He went inside and flicked the TV on low. Wandering into the kitchen he grabbed a beer and sank down onto the couch. His son was amazing. He was everything Daniel remembered being at his age, before he'd lost his parents. He was polite, interested in everything, he questioned everything, he could already read Egyptian hieroglyphs and speak Ancient Egyptian and Greek. He was a great kid. He'd listened to Daniel's explanation for his absence and had been upset at first, but had gradually understood.
He'd opened up to Daniel and had happily called him 'dad'. He was willing to accept Daniel into his family. Now all Daniel had to do was work on Rachel. He sighed and took another sip of his beer. That was going to be harder than he'd first thought. Her initial anger towards him had slowly decreased over the last week. Although she was always friendly and polite with him when Danny was around, she was distant with him when they were alone.
He didn't blame her. But the problem was, the more time he spent around her, the more he began to realize that he still held feelings for her. Feelings long ago forgotten surfaced when he looked at her. Feelings that seemed intensified with the knowledge that they had a child together. He watched her and realized that it could be so easy to fall back into a relationship with her. So easy to make this family whole.
Daniel frowned and made a decision. He needed to talk to someone about this. Not necessarily someone who made any sense...he just needed to talk. He picked up his keys and drove. Once there he knocked on the door and waited. He smiled as Jack opened his door.
"Hey Daniel...come in."
Daniel walked past Jack and sat down on the couch. He heard Jack moving around in the kitchen and gratefully took the beer that Jack offered. Taking a quick swig from it, he watched Jack sit down on the couch.
"So? I take it things went ok." Jack watched his friend as he placed his beer down on the table and leant back against the couch.
"Yeah. It went ok." Daniel grinned at him. "Danny...he's a great kid. He's been talking my ear off all night." Daniel chuckled. "He's very smart. He already speaks two languages, can read hieroglyphs..."
Jack rolled his eyes. "Just like his dad eh?"
Daniel nodded and laughed. "Yeah. And Rachel, she's done a great job raising him. Danny calls her his best friend. I watch the two of them together, and I feel proud. I know that doesn't make an awful lot of sense but...they love each other so much. They're comfortable around each other. I mean they have disagreements...but it's all good natured." Daniel leaned forward and grabbed his beer again.
Jack studied him carefully. "You still have feelings for her don't you?"
"Oh Jack...I look at her and it's like I'm stuck in the past. I remember every detail of our relationship. I remember the way she used to tickle me into submission when I wouldn't eat, the way in which she always brought me coffee before I knew I needed it, the way she used to hold me at night, the way I used to feel when she whispered my name. What I felt for her, it's all slowly coming back. And it's more than that now, because she's the mother of my child. I look at them and I see how easy it would be, to just walk into that family and stay. How easy it would be to fall back into a relationship with her."
Jack sighed and looked at him. "Be careful Daniel. Don't walk back into her life because of your son. If you intend to get involved with her again. Make sure it's for the right reasons - or you'll end up hurting her."
Daniel nodded. "I know. And that's the last thing I want to do - believe me. She's accepted the fact that I'm alive and willingly given me the chance to get to know my son. When I tried to explain where I'd been, she told me she didn't want to know. Jack - I wouldn't be here, doing what I do, if it weren't for her continuous support and belief in me, at a time when no one else would even listen. I owe it to her, to be there for her and Danny. I owe them both, more than either of them can imagine."
Jack nodded an understanding. "I know. And I know you've always wanted a family. Just...take it as it comes ok?"
Daniel smiled. "Ok."
*-*
Rachel opened the door and looked at him. She raised a finger to her mouth and motioned for him to come in. He silently followed her into the lounge where Danny was curled up on the couch watching TV.
"Oh Danny..." He looked up and his gaze flitted between his mom and his dad. "Would you care to explain this to me?" She pointed at Daniel, who was standing, holding a bottle of wine and a DVD.
Danny shrugged. "It's Wednesday." He then made a big show of stretching and yawning. "Bedtime." He got off the couch and ran over to them. Rachel bent down as he kissed her on the cheek and Daniel did the same. They both watched as he ran up the stairs and into his room.
Rachel laughed softly as she heard his bedroom door close and looked back at Daniel. "Whatever he's told you...it's not true!" She walked into the kitchen to fetch some glasses and he followed her.
"Really? So...you're not a good mom, or a wonderful friend....or a good cook?" Daniel leaned against the counter and studied her.
She squinted at him. "You're evil...you know that?!"
"I've been told on the odd occasion." He handed her the bottle of wine and watched as she opened it. "So...you don't get lonely either?"
Rachel's hands landed on the counter with a soft thud as she leaned against it, her head bowed slightly. "He is so grounded."
Daniel chuckled. "Can't blame the kid for trying."
Rachel looked up at him. "I am burning his copy of The Parent Trap." She giggled softly. "So - he's been at you too has he." She handed him a glass of wine and they retreated back into the lounge.
"Kind of. He actually made a good point."
"Oh?"
"Yeah...he said we needed time to get to know each other again."
Rachel nodded as she sat down opposite him. "I guess. I'm not exactly the person you met 9 years ago...and I can place money on the fact that you aren't the same person either." She frowned. "But I don't want him getting any false hopes."
Daniel placed his glass down on the table and leant forward, resting his arms on his legs. "Rachel...I have to be honest with you about this. I think Danny is amazing and I'm determined to be a good father to him - no matter what. I want to be part of his life now...a big part. But I look at you...and in some ways, it's like I never left. I still have feelings for you. I could willingly walk back in here and...make this family whole."
Rachel looked at him sadly. "Daniel...you don't know me. Any feelings you have...are for someone who lived 8 years ago. I not really sure I'm ready to forgive you yet...never mind consider the possibility of anything other than friendship. I need to know that no matter what happens between us...you'll never walk away from your son."
"Our son Rachel." Daniel gently took one of her hands. "You believed in me before. You had a faith in me...that no one else had."
"...and you betrayed me. You walked away, with no explanation. You married the first woman you met. I'm not sure that faith could ever be there again."
"Rachel...it was..."
"...complicated?" Rachel took her hand out of his. "Yes I'm sure it was Daniel. And no...I don't want details, because it no longer matters."
Daniel looked down. "Is there...anyone in your life?"
"No...not many people want to take on a seven year old boy Daniel."
Daniel closed his eyes. "I'm sorry...that was incredibly stupid and insensitive of me."
"Not to mention none of your business." Rachel sighed softly. "This isn't helping. I think you should go."
She stood up and gasped as Daniel placed his hand on her arm. "Rachel...I'm sorry. It's just..."
"...it's just what Daniel?" Rachel saw what Daniel was going to do just as he thought it. Before he could kiss her she moved out of his grip and opened the front door. He looked over at her startled and then, collecting his jacket, walked out. She shut the door and lent her head against it. "Not that Daniel...anything but that."
*-*
"He tried to kiss you?!"
Rachel rolled her eyes and looked at Sally. "He thought about it. I've seen that look on his face, so many times before."
"My god...so...are you two...?"
"No we're not! For one, he's not the same person I fell in love with. And regardless of any other excuse I can come up with, and believe me they are in great abundance, I don't feel that way about him anymore." Rachel looked up at her friend, whose eyebrows had climbed up her forehead. "Ok. The man I had feelings for...no longer exists. He's changed...we both have. I'm just...I'm not sure I need the added complication in my life at the moment."
Sally sighed and drank some of her coffee. "But he's going to be in your life isn't he? He's going to be there for Danny. You can't avoid him forever."
"I know." Rachel frowned and looked out across the square. "I'm dealing with a ghost from my past...and that's all he is."
Sally smiled softly. "But you love him...you never stopped loving him."
Rachel looked back at her. "Maybe that's the problem? I look at him and although he's changed...I still feel so much for him. In many ways, I still see the man he was. Whilst he was gone, it was easy to deal with...now he's here..."
"Have you spoken to him about this?"
"No."
"Then maybe you should." Rachel shook her head softly. "It's Christmas in two weeks time Rachel...what are you going to do then?"
Rachel sighed heavily. "I haven't thought about it. And to be perfectly honest with you...I don't want to either."
"Bad memories?"
"He..." She frowned softly. "...he proposed to me, the last Christmas we spent together...I turned him down. I don't think...he ever really understood why and I don't think he ever forgave me. Then...a year later, he was gone...and I was pregnant."
Sally waved over the waiter and paid the bill. " Well...if you want my opinion, I think the two of you still have issues...and they need to be dealt with. Sooner rather than later."
Rachel stood up and picked up her jacket which she'd slung over the chair. She looked out over the snow covered square and wondered exactly how honest she was being with herself. "You're not wrong there."
*-*
Daniel cleared the locker room in record time. He was annoyed that the latest mission had over-run. It was Christmas Eve and he'd promised Danny he'd be there. He checked his watch. 9pm. Sighing with frustration he left the locker room and ran down the hall to the elevator. He walked in and punched the button for the upper levels.
"Hey!" Jack shouted down the hall and Daniel held the elevator for him. "Thanks."
"You're welcome."
Jack checked his watch and pulled a face. "It's a bit late...you going to go over there?"
"I have to...I promised Danny." Daniel watched the floor numbers pass by. "Besides...Rachel would never forgive me if I didn't."
Jack shuffled his feet absently on the floor. "So...have you told her how you feel?"
Daniel frowned and looked down at the floor.
"Daniel...you need to talk about it. Who knows?...maybe she still feels something for you too." Daniel's head snapped up. "You won't know...until you tell her."
"I can't...the last Christmas we spent together...I proposed. She turned me down. Now is not a good time Jack."
Jack stepped out of the elevator and walked beside Daniel to the car lot. "Of course it is...Christmas is all about family, friends and the people we love. Now...is the perfect time." Jack unlocked his car and turned to face Daniel. "I'll see you tomorrow....bring Rachel and Danny."
Daniel sighed as Jack drove away. "Easy for you to say." He muttered as he unlocked his own car, checked that all the presents were in the trunk and made his way over to Rachel's house. All the lights were on, which he supposed was a good sign. He unloaded his Santa sack of presents and checked his jacket pocket for the most important one. Smiling, he gingerly made his way up the snow covered path and knocked on the door. He heard Danny's excited shout and the thud of footsteps on the stairs and was greeted by his son's excited face as the door opened.
"You came!"
"Of course I came. I promised didn't I?" Daniel smiled and then frowned as Danny stopped him coming in.
"Wait....MOM!" Danny shouted and ran into the house. Daniel looked after him confused. While he waited he studied the decorations outside the house and then finally understood as he looked upwards.
Rachel appeared at the front door and frowned. "Aren't you coming in?"
"Um...yes. I was. But Danny told me to wait...and then called you." He smiled softly.
Rachel looked at him confused and then followed the direction of Daniel's finger with her eyes. "Oh..."
Daniel looked up at the mistletoe and then back at Rachel and shrugged. "It is tradition."
"Yes...but it doesn't mean we have to follow it." Rachel stood back to allow Daniel in. He took one step into the house and turned to her. "Daniel..."
He silenced her with a soft kiss. "Merry Christmas Rachel."
His face was still close to hers. "You shouldn't have done that." Her voice was just above a whisper. She gently drew him back into the kiss and was vaguely aware that he had dropped the presents on the floor. His arms pulled her closer as their emotions finally surfaced.
"Come on...will you guys kiss already and..." Danny stopped dead as he rounded the corner. He watched with a grin as his parents broke the kiss but stayed in each others arms. "...so?"
Rachel laughed softly and turned to look at her son. "We'll see how things go." She looked back at Daniel who smiled and winked at her.
"Cool......so give me my presents!" Daniel grinned as he stepped out of Rachel's embrace and she followed them into the front room. Daniel emptied out the sack into the middle of the floor and sat back on the sofa as Rachel went to make the coffee. "Wow..." Danny's eyes were wide. "...are these all for me?"
"Every last one." Daniel smiled as his son excitedly began to rip the paper off his presents. Soon excited shouts sounded through the house and Rachel smiled as she brought the coffee in.
"I think he's impressed."
"I think so." Daniel took the coffee mug and sipped the warm liquid. Rachel made her way back out to the kitchen to find a bag to put all the rubbish in. She was routing through one of the cupboards when a soft voice interrupted her. "You weren't going to tell me - were you?"
Rachel found the bag and straightened up, leaning against the counter as she did. "Tell you what?"
"How you felt."
"No. Daniel...I look at you and I still see the man who left me behind. But you've changed...we both have." She looked down at the bag in her hands and then back up at him. "I'm confused. I mourned you for so long...and now here you are, and part of me still loves you. I'm just not sure what I'm in love with. The memory of what we once had...or the man stood infront of me."
Daniel pulled her into a hug and held her tightly. "I have changed. Too much has happened in my life. And I understand what you're saying. But what we once had...it's worth fighting for. It's worth fighting to see if we can get that back. I know I didn't fight for it before...but I want to fight for it now." He pulled back and studied her face. He took one of her hands and placed it over his heart. "In here...I'm the same man you loved. What I want to know...is could you love him again?"
A sad look crossed her face as Daniel waited for an answer. "I never stopped loving him." She gently leaned up and kissed him.
"Mom?" Rachel stiffened slightly and turned to her son. "Can dad have his presents now?"
"No sweetie. Your father can have his presents tomorrow - on Christmas Day."
Danny scowled. "But...he won't be here when I wake up."
Rachel ushered him towards the stairs. "He'll be here when you wake up...go on. Bedtime."
"Daddy...can you tuck me in?"
Daniel was still slightly shocked by Rachel's comment to her son. "Sure...lead the way." Daniel followed his son into his room and looked around. He smiled at the photo of Danny in a school play and a very old photo of his parents next to it.
Danny jumped into bed happily and pulled the comforter over him. "Mom says you'll be here when I wake...are you staying over?"
Daniel frowned slightly and sat down on the edge of his bed. "How would you feel about that?"
Danny grinned. "It's cool. I wish you were here all the time."
Daniel smiled. "Do you now?"
Danny smiled as a tear fell from his eye. "That's what I've wished for every Christmas. A real family."
"I love your mom Danny...but it's been a long time. We've both changed. But we've both agreed to try. I want you to have a real family too." Daniel hugged his son. "Merry Christmas Danny."
"Merry Christmas Dad."
*-*
Daniel wandered into the kitchen and opened a bottle of red wine. He poured out two glasses and headed back into the lounge. Handing one glass to Rachel he smiled at the expression on her face.
"You know I can't drink red wine Daniel."
He waved a finger at her. "No...correction. You can drink red wine. You don't like drinking red wine because you become incredibly affectionate and truthful when you drink it."
"Busted!" Rachel arched her eyebrow at him. "So would that be why you're offering it to me? To get me to talk?"
Daniel smirked. "Now would I be that devious?"
"In a word...yes." She placed the glass down on the table and looked at him. "What's on your mind?"
"You and Danny." He took a sip from his glass and placed it down on the table next to hers. "He's my son and I love him. I want to be there for him for the rest of his life. And I want to be there for you too." He sighed softly. "I love you Rachel. This house. You and Danny. You're the family I have always wanted. The piece of my life that I was missing. And I don't want to let go of that."
"But is it what you want Daniel...or is it just something you've longed for, that's conveniently fallen into your lap? Because you need to be sure...we both need to be sure. There's someone else involved now...we can't just walk away anymore."
"You told Danny I would be here in the morning when he wakes. Why?"
"Because each Christmas, he's wished that his father was here. And this Christmas...he has his wish. And I don't want him to miss a minute of it." Rachel looked into his blue eyes as he moved closer to her. "I don't want to miss a minute of it."
"It would be the perfect Christmas Fairytale..." Daniel whispered softly.
"...yes it would. But are we doing it for us...or for an 8 year old boy, who wants nothing more than for his parents to get back together."
Daniel reached out and pulled her closer, softly capturing her lips with his. He could taste the red wine on her lips, combined with a hint of Cinnamon. He broke the kiss softly. "I'm doing this...for me."
Rachel smiled softly and stood up, pulling him with her. She led the way upstairs, softly 'sshing' him as he tried to talk to her.
Danny lay in his bed and grinned when he heard his parents hushed voices. He turned over in bed and looked out of his window. "Thank you Santa."
*-*
"Our lives can change as often as the winds....change can be for the good or the bad...and sometimes we have to grow apart...in order to grow together."
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