Story of the Muffin Girl by Jo Wilson.
Disclaimer: I do not own anything to do with Stargate, MGM or any of its affiliates. No disrespect is intended to anyone...SG1 just wanted to come and play with me for a little while...Mum, what do you mean I have to give them back?
This little story is written in the point of view of Jack and Sam's two year old daughter Catherine. Much love to my very own little Muffin Girl Emily who was the inspiration behind this.
'I've been sat in my pushchair for ages now and I'm getting really bored. Daddy won't buy me any sweeties or let me have any Dr Pepper either. Guess I'm going to have to resort to crying. However, as I open my lungs to voice my annoyance I realise Daddy isn't there to pay attention to me. Neither's Mummy. I mean I've not been abandoned by any means, Aunty Vala and Uncle Daniel are sat across from me and Uncle Cam and Uncle Teal'c are in deep discussion but this doesn't explain where my mummy and daddy have gone. I decide that I'm going to have to resort to drastic measures if I'm to solve the problem of not being given what I want and decide to bash my head furiously into the back of my seat and throw my toy alien at Daniel all whilst attempting to cry, scream and hold my breath at the same time (I didn't say I was any good at it) until Vala comes over and lets me loose for a cuddle. Ahh...relative freedom at last. I look at her with my big brown eyes, hoping she'll think I'm as cute as hell and give me something nice to eat (not those celery sticks Mummy makes me eat...next time I'm going to bite her I think). Then she says ''It's okay baby. Mummy and Daddy will be out soon then we'll see about getting you some of those nice carrot sticks you like so much''. Witch. She's supporting the enemy. I only eat the carrot sticks because I hate the parsnip she gives me at dinner. So I burst into tears again until Uncle Cam takes me from the evil carrot supporting alien and says ''Hey Catie. Can I have a cuddle?'' I look at him for a moment and throw my arms round his neck tightly. Okay. I admit it. I'm creeping. All I want is something tasty to eat. He then shifts me to his left arm and hip ''Do you want something fun to eat?'' I nod in delight. I've finally got through to one of these overgrown babies. He checks his right hand BDU pocket and says ''Sorry honey. I'm all out of chocolate buttons''. I look at him in disbelief. This is just too much. So close and yet so far so I begin to scream as loud as I can. I get even louder when Cam wrestles me back into my pushchair. That's when my Aunty Dodo walks in...she's got a muffin and I just know she loves me too much to say no. I'm still sobbing and snivelling when I say ''Dodo. Me have some muffin please?''. She looks at me and I see that the muffin is chocolate, vanilla and blueberry. My favourite. As soon as she smiles sympathetically at me I know I've finally won this round ''Of course you can Catie. You wanna share it with me?'' I nod rapidly and hold my little hands out as Auntie Dodo breaks the muffin in half and gives me half. The others are looking at her in disbelief. Aunty Dodo is well known for not been treated as a doormat and here she is, giving into me immediately. ''You know what Mummy said Jodie;'' Daniel hissed at her ''No junk food'' ''Dodo doesn't care does she baby girl. Mummy's just being mean'' says Dodo as she helps me put a piece of muffin in my mouth. I don't care. I'm in heaven. That strange Ori lady could turn upright now and I wouldn't care. All I care is about is me and my muffin. Then I hear a high pitched squeal that didn't come from me...I look around puzzled then continue to devour my muffin. Then Daniel picks me up and we go into the room where the crying is coming from. Mummy is holding something in her arms but as it's not another muffin I'm not in the slightest bit interested and begin to cry again. Daddy picks me up and says ''Catie. This is your new baby sister Emily...don't be scared. She wants to meet you'' BABY SISTER! BABY SISTER! I don't remember being told this. I know Mummy got fat but I thought that's why we were eating peas. ''Me no want baby sister. Me want Dr Pepper'' I sob into my daddy's shirt. He reaches down and hands me a bottle of my favourite drink but before he opens it he reads me the little gift tag attached to it 'To Catherine love from Emily xxx'. I blink in surprise. Maybe this little pink thing isn't so bad I think so I say ''Me hold her Mummy please?'' ''Of course you can. Jack put her next to me'' so Daddy puts me on the bed beside Mummy and she hands me the blob in a blanket who yawns at me. ''See Catie. She's saying hello'' Mummy's yawning too though and I know she can say 'Hello' for real but I let this little point slide as my baby sister tries to grab my face. Daddy brushes a crumb of muffin off my nose and sighs in defeat. ''Well Sam. I think this one likes muffins too''. Mummy looks at me in horror ''Oh good heavens. This can't be happening again'' Hehe. Us Muffin Girls have to stick together and I know that the blob agrees too...she's holding my hand : ) End.