Watching the Rain

Watching the Rain

by aces

Title: Watching the Rain
Author: aces
Email: mwiget@knox.edu
Category: Thoughts
Episode related: 413 The Curse
Season: any Season
Pairing: Daniel/other
Rating: PG
Warnings: none
Summary: It's just Daniel and the rain
Disclaimer: Stargate SG-1 and its characters are the property of Showtime/Viacom, MGM/UA, Double Secret Productions, and Gekko Productions. I have written this story for entertainment purposes only and no money whatsoever has exchanged hands. No copyright infringement is intended. The original characters, situations, and story are the property of the author(s).

So I wrote this in under an hour after watching "The Curse" again and reading something I'd written in my journal about rain. Amazing the stuff comes out of a person's brain at 1 am, isn't it? Anyway, hope you enjoy reading it...it's a gentle story, one of those contemplative ones. I don't own the characters, nor do I make any money off writing this; I only write for the entertainment of it, and because Daniel is such a fun character to mess around with (well...you know).

WATCHING THE RAIN

The rain was pattering outside.

It was Daniel's turn to be on watch. He didn't understand why they had watches on planets like this--obviously uninhabited, obviously peaceful, obviously without threat. But they continued to have these watches, every night and day, like clockwork. He supposed it was a military thing--and considering how often things hadn't turned out to be what appearances first showed, he supposed he should just shut up and be grateful.

So he sat and watched. It had rained off and on throughout the night, so he was staying awake inside his tent rather than outside it--how this helped him keep watch and make sure no random rampaging (nonexistent) Goa'uld or random pillaging (again, nonexistent) villagers attacked their camp, he wasn't sure, but he figured it was the principle of the thing. And knowing his luck, Jack would decide to check up on him, find him asleep, and give him a chewing out that would wake up both Sam and Teal'c and he'd have to suffer their knowing looks the rest of the day. He got yelled at often enough as it was.

His watch was almost over; he could see through the gap in his tent a rose-grey dawn beginning to break wearily through the night. And the rain pattered softly against his tent, a gentle, welcoming sound, as if the planet were glad for some human company. He liked the sound. He never heard it at the SGC, so far underground, and he barely paid attention to it when he was at home in his apartment. But now, when he had nothing better to do, he could listen to the pattern of the sound. He found himself trying to make a language out of the rain.

When he'd been younger, he'd enjoyed standing outside in the rain. Not in a downpour, when the rain slapped you angrily in the face, just in a light drizzle, when the rain caressed your face, kissed your lips. It had been like taking a shower outside. A renewal for the earth and for himself.

Other children had played in the rain, jumped in puddles and stomped on worms. He'd stood there with his face upturned and his eyes closed, welcoming the loving embrace of the rain. He'd kept up the habit through grad school, till he was a young adult, working with his archaeology professor. Working with Steven and Sarah. She'd found him outside in the rain like that once, a few months after they'd met. He'd wandered out of the archaeology building one afternoon, a folder and a mug of coffee in hand, because he'd seen it was raining, not too hard. Within a couple minutes, the folder had become soaked, the coffee diluted with rainwater. He hadn't noticed. He wouldn't have cared too much if he had.

"Do you enjoy getting wet?" she'd asked from behind, quiet amusement coloring her words. He'd swung around, long hair getting in his eyes, and smiled, raising the hand with the coffee mug to brush his bangs away.

"Sometimes," he'd said. "When it's like this." He'd turned back into the rain, closing his eyes again, breathing in the scent of wet pavement and grass and air. He'd opened his eyes again to glance at her out of the corner of his eye when she came to stand beside him, looking around with her arms folded lightly in front of her, a warm presence at his side. "Don't you?"

She'd nodded, a smile spreading across her face as she took in the view. "Mmm, yes, I think I see what you mean." She'd smiled up at him, then leant up and kissed him lightly on the lips. When she'd stepped back, she'd nodded at his folder. "Your notes are all soggy."

"Yeees..." He'd glanced reflexively down at first his folder, then his coffee mug, before looking at her consideringly again. He'd been unsure how to respond to that kiss. He'd been unsure how to respond to her for the past few months, quite frankly. She was very good at her work, and she was a very friendly person, but he could be very shy when he wanted to be, and apparently he'd wanted to be very shy around her. "Well, I can always rewrite them later. Did you just kiss me?"

She'd nodded. "I hope you don't mind," she had said mock-seriously, a mischievous twinkle in her eye. "You're very cute when your hair hangs in your eyes like that."

"Thank you." He'd paused before adding in what he hoped was a casual tone, "You're just very cute all the time, so..." He'd risked glancing at her, and given her his best boyish smile.

She'd laughed and taken his arm, leading him inside. "C'mon. Knowing you, you'll catch a cold if you stay out here any longer."

He'd allowed himself to be carried away.

Daniel hadn't stood outside in the rain deliberately, enjoying its caress on his face, its kiss on his lips, in a very long time. He suddenly had an urge to do it again, for nostalgia's sake. He slipped out of his tent, standing in the mud and looking around. The morning greyness was bleak, fog seeping in around the trees surrounding the clearing in which they'd set up their camp, a few stars still twinkling weakly in what was left of the night. The air was cold, fresh with the rain. He shut his eyes and breathed in its scent and remembered.

"I can't go on like this anymore," she'd said, storming out of the archaeology building. They'd been running some tests together on an artifact; it was late, and everyone else had gone home, though not before yet another argument between Steven and Daniel about Daniel's theories. Dr Jordan had looked on silently with a troubled frown, not interfering. He never interfered. He only listened. Daniel was just grateful he listened.

"Sarah--" He'd caught her arm, pulling her back; she'd whirled around to face him, blonde curls flying in her face, becoming flattened by the steady rain falling around them. He'd reached up to gently untangle a curl from her eyelash, the smile on his face apologetic, begging to avoid another argument tonight; she'd grabbed his hand and held it, staring at him.

"Why can't you stop this, Daniel?" she'd asked. "Don't you see what you're doing? You're distancing everyone. No-one will get near you now; no-one will talk to you. Steven's right; you're mad to keep talking this way."

"I'm not mad," he'd told her gently, releasing his hand from hers, trying to block the hurt. She'd stopped believing in him. Everyone had stopped believing in him. His own grandfather had just kicked him out again when he'd come visiting that weekend. Everything was falling apart. "I just...I know what I know."

She'd shaken her head, rain droplets glistening like tears in her golden hair in the golden streetlights, misted by the rain. "You've got to stop talking this way, Daniel. Please. You're ruining your career--and mine, and Dr Jordan's. Give it up!"

"I can't give it up!" he'd yelled back, snapping at last, blinded by the rain trapped inside his glasses. "It's what I believe Sarah. How can you ask me to do that?!"

"You can't ask me to destroy my career along with yours!" she'd shot back.

"No," he'd said, staring at her. "Of course I can't." He'd shaken his head, his shoulders, and looked away. "I'm sorry," he'd said simply, incapable of looking her in the eye. "I should have known better. I'm sorry." He'd trudged back inside, damp clothes clinging as the rain continued to fall on her behind him. It had been only the first of more fights, the beginning of the end of that life.

Daniel opened his eyes, looking around the campsite quickly. The others were nowhere to be seen, still sleeping or meditating in their tents. He let the soft pattering of the rain on leaves and grass and tents ease the headache that had started forming behind his temples, and gave himself a few more mintues before he would wake the others so they could finish their tests and leave this place, find another planet to explore or stir up trouble.

It hadn't been raining the last time he'd seen Sarah. No, it had been a sunny day at the professor's funeral, it had been a dazzlingly sunny day in Egypt. He'd crept into that cemetary, afraid to go back to that past he'd deserted five years ago, afraid to face that grief and mourning. Seeing Sarah had reminded him of so many things. When they'd walked around the graveyard, after Steven had left so precipitately and resentfully, she'd reached up to hesitantly finger his short hair. "It suits you," she'd said thoughtfully, giving him her smile as she dropped her hand. "Brings out your facial structure. But I do miss the hair in your eyes."

He'd smiled back, taking her hand in his again. They'd reminisced; she'd delicately brought up why he had so long delayed his return to them. Seeing her had reminded him of so many things. She had reminded him of the rain. It almost never rained on Abydos.

"Daniel? Whatcha doin' out here?" Jack's voice, scratchy with sleep and oddly breathless, penetrated Daniel's thoughts, and he turned to face his friend, rain running gently down his cheeks. Jack blinked at him, not realizing how absurd he looked carrying his blanket around his shoulders like a shawl, then asked sarcastically, "You like getting wet or something?"

Daniel smiled softly in reply. "Yeah, sometimes," he said, turning back into the rain and closing his eyes. "Don't you?"

"No," Jack grumbled, wrapping the blanket more tightly. "Why don't I go wake up the others, since you're so busy communing with the rain gods. I want us out of here ASAP, got that, Danny? We've spent enough time here. And I don't want to be laid up in the infirmary with a cold for the next two days."

"Yeah, Jack," Daniel replied without looking at the colonel. "I got it."

He could feel Jack still looking at him thoughtfully, and he turned back to give his friend an inquiring look. Jack shook his head. "I didn't know you liked the rain so much," he said simply.

Daniel breathed in the scent of a newly washed earth, felt the dampness of his clothes and the tickle of rain in his hair on top of his head. He closed his eyes and saw the glistening of rain on pavement in lamplight, Sarah standing alone in the darkness and watching him leave. He opened his eyes again to look at Jack.

"It has its moments."